The end of the month is almost over and American Thanksgiving is over but I recently watched a video by Asian Boss, on his North Korean series. Particularly the videos “What North Koreans Think of South Korea” and “What North Koreans Think of North Korea” made me feel grateful for the freedom that I often take for granted. That seems silly to think of freedom as something to be grateful for. After all, doesn’t everyone have freedom?
And truthfully, I don’t think that just because you don’t have freedom, doesn’t mean you can’t be happy. I think you could have nothing but still be happy. But because of the freedom we have, we’re allowed to pursue the dreams we want to pursue, be as materialistic or as non-materialistic as we want, fight or love other people the way we want, and even be as outspoken (or not outspoken) as we want to be.
But I realized that I’m also grateful for being allowed to experience other people’s perspectives—whether that be through videos, blog posts, books, or social media. I would have never known the perspective of someone who had grown up on nothing, if not for interviews or through stories. At one point, one of the interviewees started talking about plastic. Plastic is literally everywhere. In fact, it’s so common that it’s even in the sea, harming wildlife because it’s not supposed to be there. But apparently, plastic (in N. Korea) is both expensive and hard to get. Glass is easier to get. The reason this matters is because whatever is in that glass bottle is something that can be used to feed the family. And unlike plastic, once you drop a glass bottle—it’s gone.
Of course, our situations and our environments are different. But I still think it’s a good way to take away a lesson and made me, personally, feel more grateful for the environment that I get to live in. But I get to do all the things I want to do and even stress out about my future, because I have a future to be stressed about (as cheesy as that sounds).
Lately, I’ve been feeling overwhelmed because I feel like my 20s went by and I accomplished nothing. I’m going to be working a minimum wage job for at least 2-3 more years and I’m going to have to go through interviews for another 4-6 years. I haven’t experienced what it’s like to fall in love. That’s what bothers me the most. Not that I don’t have a significant other (honestly, who cares) but the fact that I hadn’t gotten to experience life when I was still young and in school (not that I’m not young because I am). I’m also going to be living with my parents for at least 5-6 more years.
And maybe it’s because I’m growing older but I don’t really see the point of friends. I’ve been thinking the words “friends” and “family” as synonymous. Which isn’t necessarily a bad thing but then I find myself surrounded by acquaintances that I don’t feel 100% comfortable around. But maybe that’s just the introvert in me? Do other people feel this way too?
I feel lucky that I’m able to be as privileged as I am and that I’m not only able to share my experiences and thoughts with others, but also be able to listen to them, watch them and read about them too.
(In other news, I got Zelda for my Switch and it’s SO much fun).
My name is Rezina. I’m Korean-American. I’m an introvert and I like reading a lot. I have a degree in library and information science and am currently job hunting. I like taking film photos with my Olympus Om-1 and love 뉴이스트 ♡